Wanted: Tickets to Coachella

Thinking about summer music festivals always makes me sad because I never get to go, for some reason or another. There's the obvious geographic problem, i.e. what is there worth going to in Northern California? But Coachella (in SoCal), on the other hand. Look at the headliners. Paul McCartney, The Killers, and The Cure, which are right up my lane. Although I tend to view Paul McCartney less as an independent artist and more as a former Beatle. I can't help it. Unlike, say, Dave Grohl, I don't think Paul's solo career will ever overcome the fact that he was one a part of Something Really Big. This week I was supposed to decide which summer music festival I would most want to attend, and for a bit, I was sort of torn between Coachella and Bonnaroo. I think there were maybe three deciding factors. One: I don't really want to go to Tennessee. It's completely not worth the long and expensive flight, made all the more unbearable by the inevitable five-hour stop in Denver, Colorado, or somewhere equally not-my-destination. And Two (see Exhibit A): Bonnaroo does not have The Cure, now does it? It almost makes up for this serious flaw by having Bruce Springsteen, who I've been dying to see live if only my wallet could take it. But I don't love Bruce Springsteen anywhere near as much as I love Robert Smith, who I have a somewhat irrational crush on. Irrational because he's 30 years older, not to mention married. But he's brilliant, and witty, and I imagine he would be a great conversationalist. And Three: the other headliners for Bonnaroo are kind of lame, in my opinion. I would so much rather see Paul McCartney and The Killers than Phish and the Beastie Boys. So it's decided. Now if only I had tickets. And a way to miss class for a couple days without getting screwed. Seriously, whose idea was it to have mandatory attendance for college classes? I thought they weren't supposed to be babysitting us, so what gives?

Exhibit A: